It’s very easy to find yourself in a situation where you’re living your life as though nothing matters. To wake up every day and do the same thing. To go to that dead-end job you hate, be around people you don’t like. You find yourself hating your life and in some cases you don’t even realize that there’s anything wrong with that because you tell yourself “that’s life.” Not realizing that there’s more to life. I used to be in that situation. This resulted in me throwing my life away, living a life with no improvement and turning to different vices to make myself feel better. I didn’t have to live like that, neither should you. I’d like to share the steps that led to my life changing, to me living a passion filled life, living with purpose and finding fulfillment.
How to find fulfillment
1. Spiritual fulfillment
Before any change could take place in my life, my spiritual life had to change first. If your spiritual life is suffering or is not being fed or your life is in contrast to it, you will not feel fulfilled. You might blame it on other things but if the way you’re living your life is not in line with your spiritual needs and values, it will cause friction in your life. Until you do something about it, you’ll feel disjointed and lost but unable to pinpoint exactly what the problem is. You might even blame it on your circumstances.
For me, things changed around when I turned to God. That’s where I find my spiritual fulfillment. I had turned away from that and until I accepted that it was the missing link, what was causing discord in my life, I couldn’t move forward in anything worthwhile. For me I felt found when I turned to God. I now have an anchor. I feel loved unconditionally. With so much uncertainty in life, this one certainty allows me to face life confidently. Find out what it is for you and do something about it. Feed your Spirit and nourish your soul because without sorting that out first, it will be difficult to find fulfillment in your life.
2. Self-love
Many people think self-love is some form of arrogance but without self-love it’s near impossible to live a fulfilled life. We often want to treat the symptoms of a lack of this, such as alcohol or drug abuse without treating the root cause. Whether or not you love yourself will determine what you allow into your life and how you treat yourself. There are some things that if you loved yourself you wouldn’t entertain. For example if you truly loved yourself you wouldn’t do some things you consider normal at the moment but are symptoms of your lack of self-love. Examples of these are drinking every night or taking drugs.
Lack of self-love is a huge problem for many people but it goes undiagnosed that not many people realize they suffer from it. I know I’m talking about it as though it’s some sort of disease, that’s because it is. The worst kind because it’s symptoms are what ends up being treated as diseases without dealing with the root cause. This results in the symptoms coming back and people don’t know what to do anymore. You could be suffering from it without knowing it.
Look at your life right now. If you loved yourself would you be in the relationship you’re in? Would you be spending time with the people you spend time with if you loved yourself? Would you frequent the places you frequent? Would you ingest the substances that you take that you know are damaging your body?
I’m not talking about something I know nothing about. It’s only a few years ago that someone pointed out to me that I didn’t love myself. I didn’t think so but upon reflection I realized she was right because the kinds of relationships I got into showed a lack of self-love. The amount of drinking I did and the smoking I was doing was evidence of the same. I can’t tell you if you love yourself or not, only you can honestly answer that. Take time to reflect on it and if you find that you don’t love yourself, make a conscious decision to do so. It might not seem like much at the beginning but it will change your life because it will govern your decision making and what you allow into your life.
3. Vision
It’s easy to go through life with things just happening to you and around you without you playing a major part in it. A life where you react to things instead of being proactive. I say that is no life at all. If you live like that you’ll wake up one day and if someone asked what you did with your life, you’ll have no answer for them. That’s why you need a vision for your life.
If you’re going to embark on a journey, before you take the first step you need to know where you’re going. If you don’t, you could be easily led stray and end up where you never intended in the first place. Why then would things have to be different concerning your life? If you’re going to succeed in your life, according to what success looks like for you, you need to have a vision. A road map of where your life is headed. I talk more about that in this post on why you need a vision for your life.
4. Passion
If you’re going to live a life worth living, you have to live a passion filled life. In some way or another, you have to follow your passion or passions. You might already be saying “then where am I supposed to get money if I stop everything and follow my passion?” I know most of us have jobs that we don’t love or jobs that we’re doing just to put food on the table. I get that. However that should not stop you from following your passion or passions. Passion gives meaning to what you do, what you pursue.
Let me give myself as an example. I have a 9 – 5 job that puts food on the table. That didn’t stop me from pursuing what I’m passionate about as well. I have the passion to inspire and motivate people to follow their dreams and live a passion filled life. I get to do that through my writing and speaking, both things that I enjoy. I started this blog to pursue my passion, from this I ended up writing books as well. I’m also a motivational speaker. I’m doing all this whilst having a 9 – 5 job.
Some people are fortunate in that their work is their passion, for some that’s not the case. My point here is that even if your work is not your passion, you can still find ways to pursue your passion on the side. In time you will be able to do it full time and it will result in making you money somehow. I know not long from now I’ll be able to pursue my passions full time and I look forward to that. It’s important to pursue your passion or passions because it will add to fulfillment in your life.
I know some people are not sure what exactly they are passionate about. It’s imperative that you find out because you will always wonder why nothing ever fulfills you. I wrote about how to figure out what you are passionate about in another post, you can go and read about it some more if you’d like.
5. Purpose
If you live a life of purpose, you will always be fulfilled. Sometimes we think that what we are passionate about is our purpose. I’ve found that is not always the case. Since I discovered what I was passionate about, I’ve pursued that but I’ve always known that it was not my purpose. I know God will fulfill His purpose for my life and because of that I didn’t think it was necessary for me to know what that purpose was. I felt that as long as I was living my life with passion God would fulfill the purpose for my life.
It’s only after reading In a pit with a lion on a snowy day by Mark Batterson that I realized I can actually ask God what the purpose for my life is. I did that and finding out my purpose has added a whole new dimension to my life. I discuss that in more detail in this post. Since I now know the purpose for my life, I have so much peace and alignment that it’s given me such fulfillment. Even when I didn’t know it, God was already leading me towards it, I just didn’t realize it. I’ve also discovered that as you live according to your purpose, God will give you the desires of your heart.
I don’t know what your life is like or what makes you happy or sad but I know if you’re living a life that is not fulfilling you, you need to do something about it. Life is too precious to spend it just getting by. I hope the above steps will assist you in taking the first step to find fulfillment.
