I’ve just finished reading Oprah’s book “What I know for sure” where she talked about how she was asked the question “What do you know for sure?” in 1998 and didn’t have an answer at the time. As I read the book, I asked myself what I know for sure right now and came up with a few things.
I’ll make my list “What I believe to be true right now” because as I grow and learn more, discover more, and experience more, I allow myself to change my mind or refine my thinking, something the world is not very accommodating of right now. So, what do I believe to be true right now?
Here’s what I’ve come up with so far:
- Self-love is one of the most important things in life. You can’t have a full and happy life if you don’t love yourself. My life is so much better now that I love myself and am continuing to learn how to love myself better. I’m kinder to myself and treat myself with so much care, like I would a loved one. As sad as it is, I didn’t think I deserved any of that, I didn’t believe myself to be worthy of love, including my own.
- Things outside of yourself and other people can’t make you happy. You have to find peace and happiness from within. Whether or not I’m happy is up to me, no one else.
- The mind is a powerful tool. For both good and bad. The mind can be your friend or your enemy in your life. You get to decide which way it goes. The mind carries with it things we were told growing up, good or bad and now it’s up to us to decide what to keep and what to replace. For example, if growing up you were told “rich people are evil” you might be wondering why no matter what you do, you never make as much money as you want to. Could it be the belief that rich people are evil that’s holding you back because you don’t want to be the so called “evil” or you don’t want to be alienated by your family? If this is the case, you may then have to decide for yourself what it means to be rich or to have money and then reprogram your mind accordingly. You have to master your mind because it can make you or break you. My new quote that I say to myself is: “Master your mind but lead with your heart.”
- You have to trust your gut/intuition. In line with the above, yes master your mind and use it to your benefit but when it comes to your life choices and decision making, nothing beats your gut or intuition. That inner knowing, that thing within yourself that tells you if something is right for you or if something is not your path. It usually doesn’t make sense because science can’t prove it or in some cases it may seem illogical, but deep down you know what to do or which way to go. Often we ignore this and only afterwards do we look back and think “I knew it, I should have or shouldn’t have done such and such…” You may have wanted to go a certain way but an expert said this or your partner or parent said something else and you changed your mind. So I’ve learned and am still learning to trust my gut or intuition.
- You get to create your own life, whether you realise it or believe it or not. I used to blame what my life looks like on things outside of myself. Whether it was believing fault lay with my circumstances, my environment, the way I grew up or even that God hates me. Now I know it’s all on me. Through my thoughts, my decisions, my actions or lack thereof, my life as it stands is because of my own doing. If I don’t like what I see it’s up to me to change that, something I’m currently doing in different aspects of my life. As I work on changing my life for the better and I start to see results (at a much slower pace than I hope or expect) I see the truth that you really do get to create your own life.
- You should never give up on your dreams. I’ve come to appreciate that if you don’t believe in something or believe something to be true without proof, it’s easy to give up on that thing. In the pursuit of my dreams, I study people who have succeeded in the pursuit of their dreams and impacted the world in life changing ways. Whether it’s through reading biographies and autobiographies, watching and listening to podcast interviews, watching talks they gave or many other ways, I consume content that in one way or another tells me how these people got where they are. From Oprah Winfrey to Tina Turner to Elon Musk to Steve Jobs to Daymond John to Vusi Thembekwayo and many others. Some might be what we’ve termed “geniuses” but at the end of the day they are all human beings like the rest of us. I’ve learned many things from their stories but one thing that has stood out for me is that each and every one of them never gave up on their dreams. Note I didn’t just say “never gave up” I said “never gave up on their dreams.” Yes they worked hard and did many other things which are admirable but if at any point in their lives they had given up, we wouldn’t know who they were and they wouldn’t have left or are going to leave their mark on the world. I haven’t succeeded in the ways I hope to but as I continue to go after my dreams, I choose to not give up no matter what.
- God loves me and you. I’ve struggled a lot with this one because a lot has happened in my life that made me question that. But I’ve come to accept that it’s a truth that is undeniable. I wake up every morning knowing I have a Father who loves me and that knowledge allows me to keep living and loving and dreaming and choosing to enjoy the experience of this thing called life. And on days where all this seems too much, I just keep breathing, one breathe after another.
There are many other things but let me leave it here for now. What do you believe to be true right now?
